I don't know where the time has gone.
I'm enjoying summer, a whole lot. I'm going to miss it when it's gone.
Wave runners yesterday have left me sore and bruised and sun burnt. All worth it.
Gas, expenses, food have left me broke. Some of it not so worth it.
Working 40 hours most weeks has left me tired and bored out of my mind. Hopefully it's worth it.
Staying up late and waking up early to make memories that I'll never forget. More than worth it.
It's almost August, my least favorite month. It's when summer ends and school begins.
When I move out (again) and leave my family and friends. Some of whom I wont see for two more years.
This is all about growing up and starting your life I guess.
I'm afraid to be apart for so long, what if we aren't all the same when we see each other again.
What if the jokes that are funny now, aren't funny then.
What if running through the sprinklers and hanging out at the park aren't fun when we're all twenty or older.
What if we all get married and get other friends that are married.
Or get boring jobs that we hate.
What if we aren't as happy then as we are now?
What if I'm worrying way too much about this.
I think I am, but I don't know how to not worry.
Is there a medicine for that? That doesn't involve a therapist or something, haha.
My head is so clogged. I need something to take my mind away from all this.
But there is no time for any of that. All this time we have now, we can't waste. Too precious.
I need to be less concerned about the things I get down about.
I shouldn't worry about it (boys).
I don't have time for that, it's not important.
But who's to say that they don't want to know that they're liked by some one, or that some one thinks they're pretty. Who doesn't like holding hands? And kiss? (mom you can ignore this paragraph)
Who doesn't want to be taken out on a date?
I think this will be less of a concern to me once I start school again, where the only thing I'll have time for is, biology, math, English, sociology, bowling, and American Civ . Oh, 17 credits.
I hope my brain doesn't explode, but then again maybe that might not be such a bad thing.
I just wish to be more carefree. Not worry about stupid little things.
And pay more attention to the beautiful things that I never notice.
Like how pretty summer weather is.
How many freckles each of my little brothers have.
How talented my mom is, with anything she does.
How hard working my father is for his family, how he can answer any question I ask him.
How sweet hearted my sister can be.
How Courtney laughs at all my jokes even the ones that aren't funny, how her family treats me like their own.
How carefree Hannah and her family are, and how funny.
How much I've missed having Larissa around.
How precious these days are.
How precious life is.
How blessed I am.
I never want to lose sight of any of this.